The Courage I Have Witnessed This Week!

Instead of talkIng about more problem ways of thinking, this week, I would like to digress and tell you about the courage and determination of a woman My Crew and I are working with who is battling her OCD , depression and severe anxiety to remedy her Hoarded home and save her children from being taken into care.

We worked together for 18 hours this week. She said many times how she could"t believe what she was able to do that she hadn"t been able to do alone. I admit I do have the best Crew in the world. Each person is compassionate, non-judgmental, and genuinely on the side of each person we work with.

We cleared an entire basement, sorted a complete very large backyard filled with possessions , identifying the special things, saying goodbye to the ones which were old friends and honoring them by passing them on to others who would use and appreciate them.

We laughed, supported the family through tears, reminisced celebrated successes, encouraged through fear and persisted across the finish line the family set at the beginning of the day!

You know who you are! Congratulations! It was an honor to be beside you through this struggle.part of this struggle!

Better Days ahead

Elaine Birchall and the Birchall Consulting Crew (Carden, Carlin, Matt, and Rachelle)

The Courage I Have Witnessed This Week!

HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU CATCH YOURSELF HAVING THESE OPTION ROBBING THOUGHTS?

ALL OR NOTHING THINKING:

That's right! It's BLACK or it's WHITE!

You're PERFECT or a COMPLETE IDIOT....and so by the way is everyone else!!

Things are RIGHT or WRONG and there's nothing in between!!!

The problem with ALL OR NOTHING THINKING is that life is lived in the shades of grey between right and wrong.

OUT OF CONTEXT....NOTHING is:

• true or not true....



• right or wrong......



• possible or impossible........

RIGID THINKING:

You and only you know what is right.....you feel resentful when others won't agree with you and CONTINUALLY try to prove that you are right. The problem is you also expect others to change their point of view and actions if you just pressure and persist enough.

What you miss / lose with rigid thinking is the ability to change your mind when more or better information becomes available...you've pushed everyone into the corner so much that pride won't let you admit you didn't have all / enough information...or you've defended your opinion so long and hard...you've come to believe it is the ONLY way to feel.

With VERY few exceptions there is no right and wrong about a situation...ther's just the differing way different people see and feel about it.

STAY TUNED......MORE TO COME LATER THIS WEEK.

Hi Everyone I'm Back!

What a rough ride it has been!!!

Hacked 3 times in 2 and a half months...Malware sneakily deposited among all of the great information I was trying to give all of you.

Just goes to show you Hoarding is definitely NOT the worst thing people do.

It is great to be back and I am waiting for all of you to drop by and share your experiences and well as your wisdom bourne of hard work to
"Take Back Your Life When Your Things Are Taking Over"

All the Best to Each and Everyone of You
Stay tuned I will be updating this Blog we will create together every week by Monday morning.

Cheers and better Days Ahead....

Elaine Birchall

WE HAVE WITHIN EACH OF US THE MAKINGS OF AN ARCHITECT TO DESIGN THE LIFE WE WANT AND THEN TO MAKE IT HAPPEN

As the year 2010 transitions into another year of hopes, dreams, plans, challenges and successes for each of us, I want to share something I read recently that replenished clarity for me. I offer it to each of you for the use you can make of it in your life, no matter what the challenges and changes you are facing Hoarding and non-Hoarding alike.

"A single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives."
Henry Thoreau

This quote reminded me of the courage and detemination those of you who I work with and hear from live every day, no matter where in the world you call and write from in reaching out for the help you need.

It reminded me of the wisdom each of you show in explaing to me how you need me to act on the respect I have for your needs and pace.

It reminded me of witnessing how your successes are sometimes small and incremental, not life remakes in a televised hour. I hope you remember that so that you value the small things you do everyday and don't become invalidated and impatient for lack of those "Hallmark Moments"

I would like to to celebrate some of my 2010 memories with you. I hope they demonstrate that success is not diminished by how many time you fall, it is defined by getting back up.

HATS OFF TO:

• those of you who started, became afraid and in response shelved the idea of counseling only to call back months and sometimes a year later to say "OK NOW I"M READY!" and began again

• those of you without the funds to pay for services, made and continue to honour arrangements which give you what you need and cost you what you can manage without hardship for as long as it takes!

• to "seasoned" individuals who have Hoarded for a long time and now are brave enough to face down the "ghosts" in counseling and build the re-claimed life imagined for so long

• to those of you whose lives are made tumultuous with physical and mental illnesses and yet you continue to be willing to get back up, re-group and continue on with the work needed. I am privleged and humbled to be be a part of your plan.

• to those of you who are children of Hoarders who live in fear of slipping like they did or who struggle with limits, boundaries and self esteem because they only discovered there were such things as adults when their relationships were being hurt by the lack

• to those of you who face debilitating illnesses, live with chronic pain and still are determined to ask for the help you need to have the best life possible and still laugh and find joy and things to be grateful for

• to those of you who are the last of your families and carry the yoke of "curator," missing loved ones and the comfort and love exchanged, facing current losses and still asking for help to do what is needed to get and stay on track

• to those of you who are witnesses or recipients of violence, who have been made afraid, who are sickened, ashamed and repulsed by your living environments, who live with chronic anxiety and panic attacks and who still reach out for help, and despite being sickened during the counseling & de-cluttering sessions stay in the game and perservere.

COURAGE IS BEING---(YOUR FEELINGS)---AND DOING IT ANYWAY---- WITH THE HELP YOU TRUST--IN THE WAY YOU NEED TO --AND AT YOUR PACE

I would like to acknowledge all of you and thank you for the privledge of laughing with you, witnessing your stories, being there to support you when you cried, challenging you on those life-robbing distorted beliefs you were taught/ developed in your life, celebrated with you and guided and transitioned you to your un-Hoarded life.

REMEMBER :

First dare to dream it...then imagine it.... then plan it and build it...then live it !

and so I come full circle back to H. Thoreau ..."To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives."

THE QUESTION I ASK YOU IS:

WHAT WILL YOU LET DOMINATE YOUR LIFE FROM TODAY FORWARD?

I OFFER YOU THAT:

"NO ONE EVER MOVED FORWARD LOOKING BACKWARD...

YOU SHOULD LEARN FROM THE PAST NOT LIVE IN IT".... Elaine Birchall

We have within each of us

We have within each of us